YES!

It's a tiny bit more than a month til the big move. I put my notice in at work and started packing up some photographs. I'm selling Laney's crib and changing table on Monday. It's insane to think that we're turning our lives upside down, starting over. Amazing, really. I am impressed that my husband, my wonderful husband, is making my dreams come true. He is truly a saint, a great rock, the brick wall I lean against when I feel like a wet noodle. He helps me be strong and doesn't let me indulge in pity parties. Not sure how I got so lucky. Not so sure I deserve it. But I feel lucky. I feel blessed, excited, happy, scared.
I can't express my gratitude in any way that would adequately cover it, to Mom and Mike. Not may parents would travel cross country (twice) to move their chicks and house them until they made their own roots. I am pretty sure I am beginning to feel again where I once was numb, afraid of emotions, afraid of what it means to be HOME. I expect to cry a lot over the next few months. Not out of sadness or fear, but out of FEELING. I hope I can express to all of you how much I love you. I LOVE YOU, I truly truly do.  Love-Kelly

BIRTHDAyS!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KRISSY!!!! It was actually your birthday here yesterday.. and I swear people think i'm crazy b/c I'm always posting happy birthdays "too early" on facebook ..... but I'm halfway around the world people! Have a super duber 29th, you deserve it! I LOVE YOU, xoxo val

A reminder that Life is hard sometimes

Having a blue Monday in Majuro today. Maybe its the rain or maybe its the hormones, but either way.....i need to crawl up in a ball and get out of my own head. Counting down the days until I can spend a day without children screaming in a language I don't understand.
But I am stuck thinking ...
Thinking about the holidays and how it doesn't feel like Christmas this year. After the break in and James' memorial and the non-stop-ness of December.... its hard to think that its actually Christmas time. I miss the snow, the Christmas decorations, the Christmas cookies, the silly Christmas sweaters, family.. family.... family.... i miss it all. I'm trying to find out what I did with that Osmond Family Xmas Cd - that always puts me in the Holiday Spirit.
But the big question in my head today is... Where will I be next year? Thinking about me.. me and Provan.... and how we are going to work it out and be happy... cuz in the end I guess thats all I really want. To be happy. Some new ideas are coming up..... Kelly, tell me about nursing school........

I think I can. I think I can.

Reflections on a day: I need to get a nursing job. I will get a fabulous nursing job. I love being a nurse. I can run three miles without stopping. I ran offroad and uphill some of the way. In the dark. It was amazing. Only ten more miles and I have the half marathon. I think I can. I think I can.
I am trying to stay sane. I am trying hard not to cry about closing doors and saying goodbye to all of the great things about Austin and Kris and Kayla. (Boo-hoo Kayla). Maybe they will let me take Kayla? We are going to be surrounded by people who love us. It will be amazing to have holidays surrounded by people and to make green bean casserole and have people actually eat it. I think I can. I think I can.
I applied for two jobs today. My kids are beautiful and funny and loving. They won't eat vegetables. Maybe Mom can help with that? I think I can. I think I can. (I can.) Love-Kelly

Onto The Next Season of Life

Well, yesterday we took down the awning  That's a sad day for me because I love our awning and having the patio so much.  We also probably took our last motorcycle adventure and will probably put bigboy to rest for the winter. Getting too cold for that!! We have now officially turned the corner into the world of planting bulbs, raking leaves, and trying to figure out what the heck I wore last winter.  An excuse to buy a few new things.  But this winter brings a new light to my life- the arrival of Kelly, Larry, Owen and Delaney.  The question is

       Are They Ready for the LOVE!!!



 Mom

the silver lining of badly behaved students

SOOOOOO yesterday was a bad day at school for me. The kids were crazy and I was sooooo mad. I sat down in my desk for my first break of the day fuming and literally wanting to throw myself out my classroom window. The anger persisted until I spotted something strange in the corner of my classroom... I have one of those body models with removable organs that sits on top of a lab table... its really a nice addition to my classroom and the kids like to take all the organs out and put them back together- great learning device right?.. WELL, there the model sat in the corner of my classroom. Quietly and innocently. All the organs were in place and it was standing where it always stood. But today, it had thick black pubic hair drawn in its crotch. As pissed as I should have been, all I could do was laugh b/c I thought, well at least the troublemakers are artistic. hahahaha

Missing Wallet..

It does seem to be true that my brain has officially turned into swiss cheese. My wallet is missing...totally gone. It hasn't been as big of a pain in the butt as I thought....but still.
Could it be that I am totally 1.Stressed? 2. Exhasuted? 3.Desperately in need of some rest and psychotherapy?
I want my Mommy!!!!  I hope everyone had a better week:) Love-Kelly